Six months after launch, thousands of young men have used a tool designed to help them reflect on their sexual behaviour – offering an alternative to the manosphere
Scrolling through Reddit, Drew Davis was horrified by what he read. Post after post from confused youngsters: “I think I did something wrong”, “I think I caused someone harm”, “I might have sexually assaulted someone – I don’t know what to do next”.
But it was the replies that kept Davis awake at night.
“It’s either: ‘You’re evil’, paired with something like: ‘You should kill yourself’,” said Davis, director of strategic initiatives at SafeBae, a US-based sexual violence charity. “Or it’s a permission-giving response: ‘You did nothing wrong. Women suck. Why don’t you join this private group chat?’
“It was constantly on my mind, almost an obsession. Given the rising popularity of the manosphere and those online communities, I knew we had to do something rather quickly.”
The result of Davis’ sleepless nights is Vibe Check, a free digital tool that provides an alternative to the harmful advice found either on faceless forums or dished out by AI chatbots.
Vibe Check provides an alternative to the harmful advice often found elsewhere. Image: SafeBae
And while most sexual violence resources are designed with survivors in mind, Vibe Check is built for possible perpetrators, people whose behaviour might have crossed a line, offering a route to reflection and – ultimately – accountability.
The team at SafeBae drew on a decade of working with young people, as well as the dubious advice Davis gleaned from myriad Reddit threads, to design the platform. Instead of AI, which research shows often affirms and validates harmful and illegal behaviour, Vibe Check is built around a ‘decision tree’ format, which guides young people through scenarios where they might have violated consent. Exercises based on cognitive behavioural therapy encourage reflection on harmful behaviour, and the tool offers learning around boundaries and making an apology.
As well as steering young people away from the manosphere, Davis said, it can also provide a way back into society when they’ve unintentionally caused harm. “We’re in this era of seeing powerful men like [Jeffrey] Epstein never face accountability. I think people project some of their frustration on to young men and want to hold them accountable in a way that’s disproportionate.
“With our tool, it’s about holding true: maybe this young person didn’t mean to do harm. Being open to that reality encourages them to take responsibility and make amends.”
More than 60,000 people have used Vibe Check since it launched in April, and the tool’s biggest audience outside of the US is the UK. Davis said the feedback has been “overwhelmingly positive” in terms of equipping young people with the skills to apologise, own up, or even prepare for a disciplinary process. In turn, he says, Vibe Check can make those processes less combative and less harmful for survivors.
Given the rising popularity of the manosphere and those online communities, I knew we had to do something rather quickly
SafeBae now plans to adapt the model for young people who are being sextorted. “They often think they’ve done something wrong or are going to be in trouble,” said Davis. “It has that same guilt motivation.”
Above all, Davis hopes Vibe Check is filling the gap between outright condemnation and denial, giving young people a space to take responsibility – before darker corners of the web teach them otherwise.
Main image: Youth leaders attending a SafeBae event in summer 2025. Courtesy of CheckYourVibe.org.
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