We’ve become used to measuring nearly every aspect of our physical health. Our watches track heart rates and recovery, while fitness apps document how much we move. Yet we have few comparable ways of assessing how well we manage frustration or recognize when stress is affecting our behavior.
And while exercise has well-established mental health benefits, feeling better after a workout isn’t the same as developing the emotional skills needed to handle recurring challenges.
Rio Wilson, a counselor and founder of Brain-Body Therapy, believes this distinction deserves more attention.
Live + Well
Align your week ahead with longevity tips, wellness hacks, and expert insights from LA Times Studios.
By continuing, you agree to our Terms of Service, which include arbitration and a class action waiver. You agree that we and our third-party vendors may collect and use your information, including through cookies, pixels and similar technologies, for the purposes set forth in our Privacy Policy such as personalizing your experience and ads.
What does it mean to be emotionally fit?
“We believe emotional fitness is to mental well-being what physical fitness is to physical health,” Wilson says.
Her approach combines exercise with therapeutic principles, encouraging people to track their thoughts and reactions while engaging in physical activity. The underlying premise is that movement can provide an opportunity to practice skills that extend beyond the gym.
Emotional fitness refers to our ability to recognize emotions and respond to them in ways that support our well-being. Unlike mental health, which encompasses our broader psychological functioning and conditions such as depression or anxiety, emotional fitness focuses on developing skills that can help us manage our everyday experiences.
RELATED: Build Your Joy Muscle: Real Tools for Emotional Regulation That Actually Work
The term isn’t, of course, a clinical diagnosis and one that Wilson uses to describe a more intentional approach to emotional well-being. One that encourages people to develop these skills before they find themselves in crisis.
“It’s a type of fitness that prioritizes emotional well-being alongside physical health by using intentional movement to help people regulate emotions, reduce stress, build resilience, and feel better overall,” she explains.
In her practice, Wilson often sees people who maintain demanding exercise routines but continue to struggle with emotional challenges. “I’ve met people who are incredibly disciplined physically but still struggle with chronic stress, anxiety, emotional avoidance, or unhealthy relationship patterns,” she says. “Physical fitness is incredibly valuable, but it doesn’t automatically teach emotional regulation, self-awareness, or resilience.”
Someone who exercises regularly to decompress after work may feel noticeably calmer afterward. But if they’re repeatedly having the same disagreement with a colleague, the relief they experience during exercise may have little effect on how they approach that relationship. Changing that pattern takes a different kind of practice.
“I hope we eventually view emotional fitness the same way we now view physical fitness,” Wilson says, “not as something reserved for people in crisis, but as a lifelong investment in overall health.”
How exercise influences the brain and emotional regulation
The mental health benefits of exercise have been studied extensively.
A 2024 systematic review and network meta-analysis published in The BMJ examined randomized trials involving more than 14,000 participants. Researchers found that activities such as walking, jogging, yoga and strength training could reduce depressive symptoms, although the effects varied and the certainty of some findings was limited.
Scientists have also investigated how exercise influences biological processes involved in emotional regulation.
Physical activity affects neurotransmitter systems associated with mood, including serotonin and dopamine. Researchers have also studied its effects on brain-derived neurotrophic factor, or BDNF, a protein involved in maintaining neurons and supporting neuroplasticity.
Neuroplasticity refers to the brain’s ability to change in response to experience. It’s essential for learning, although the precise relationship between exercise-induced changes in BDNF and improvements in mental health remains an active area of research.
RELATED: AI Has Become a Teen’s New Best Friend. Experts Have Concerns.
Wilson believes there’s an opportunity to build on these biological benefits by introducing psychological education into exercise routines. “One of the biggest missed opportunities is that movement alone isn’t always enough,” she says.
Her Brain-Body Therapy framework introduces an emotional concept before each workout. Participants might learn about self-compassion, for example, before completing a structured exercise session. Afterward, they’re encouraged to reflect on the experience and consider how it relates to situations outside the workout. “When we combine exercise with counseling-informed education and intentional reflection, we help people understand why they’re reacting the way they are while also putting their brain and body in a state that’s more receptive to learning and change,” Wilson explains.
A person who becomes frustrated when an exercise feels difficult might begin noticing how quickly that frustration turns into self-criticism. If they’re already working on self-compassion, the workout offers an opportunity to recognize that response as it’s happening.
Whether this awareness leads to lasting changes in behavior is another question. Research supports exercise as a tool for mental well-being, but more evidence is needed to establish whether combining it with counseling-informed education produces additional benefits.
The approach does change how a workout is evaluated. Instead of focusing entirely on sets, reps, or speed, participants are encouraged to pay attention to how they respond mentally throughout the experience.
Why “just relax” rarely works
When we’re under stress, our bodies respond before we’ve necessarily had time to make sense of what’s happening.
The sympathetic nervous system becomes more active when the brain perceives a threat. Heart rate can increase, muscles become tense, and breathing patterns may change as the body prepares to respond.
These reactions are useful in situations that require immediate action. But they can also occur during an argument or in anticipation of a difficult meeting, even when there’s no physical danger. And when stress becomes persistent, some people find it increasingly difficult to settle down afterward. “When someone has been living in a constant state of stress, asking them to simply ‘relax’ usually isn’t effective,” Wilson says. “Their nervous system doesn’t feel safe enough to do that.”
RELATED: Your Home Looks Great, but How Does It Sound? Why Auditory Design is Trending
Wilson begins by helping people understand what they’re experiencing physiologically. Knowing that certain physical sensations are associated with stress may make them easier to interpret without becoming more alarmed. She then introduces movement selected according to the person’s emotional needs.
The appropriate activity can vary considerably. Someone who’s feeling restless might prefer walking, while another person may find a slower activity more comfortable. Exercise intensity also matters, particularly for people who are sensitive to physical sensations associated with anxiety.
Wilson is especially interested in what happens when people repeatedly experience their bodies moving from heightened arousal toward a more comfortable state.
“As users repeatedly experience moving from activation into recovery, they begin developing confidence that difficult emotions are manageable rather than overwhelming,” she explains. That confidence can help anyone prone to feeling derailed by their own physiology. Exercise won’t necessarily change the circumstances responsible for someone’s distress, but physical activity can influence mood and stress physiology, potentially making those experiences easier to manage.
Wilson’s interest in movement as a mental health tool is partly rooted in personal experience. When she couldn’t consistently access traditional therapy, exercise became something she could turn to without depending on professional care. “When I couldn’t consistently access therapy myself, movement became one of the few tools that reminded me I wasn’t powerless,” she recalls.
For Wilson, the benefit came from having an activity she could choose to do and complete, even when other aspects of her life felt uncertain. “Every workout became evidence that I could still take action, keep promises to myself, and influence how I felt,” she says.
Her experience touches on the psychological concept of self-efficacy, which describes our belief in our ability to accomplish tasks and influence outcomes. People develop self-efficacy partly through experiences that demonstrate their own capabilities, and exercise can offer these opportunities in relatively concrete ways.
Someone who initially struggles to complete a short walk may notice that the same distance becomes easier with practice. For another person, maintaining a manageable routine might provide reassurance that they can follow through on something they’ve committed to. These accomplishments don’t automatically translate into emotional resilience, but they can contribute to a greater sense of personal capability. That may be particularly meaningful for people whose experiences have left them feeling powerless.
Wilson is careful to distinguish the benefits she experienced from the treatment someone may need to recover from trauma. “That doesn’t mean exercise replaces therapy,” she emphasizes. “Therapy remains incredibly important.”
How to build emotional fitness through movement
Emotional exhaustion can make ordinary activities feel unusually demanding.
Even when someone knows that exercise usually improves their mood, getting started may feel difficult. The prospect of choosing a workout or finding the energy to leave the house can become another source of frustration.
Wilson believes people often misunderstand the relationship between motivation and behavior. “One of the biggest misconceptions about motivation is that we have to feel motivated before we take action,” she says. “In reality, action often comes first.”
Wilson applies a similar principle by providing structure before participants begin exercising. “We remove decision fatigue by guiding them through a structured program based on research,” she explains. Instead of deciding what activity to do and how long to do it, participants follow a predetermined session. For someone who’s mentally exhausted, having fewer decisions to make may lower the barrier to getting started.
RELATED: How Emma Grede Is Reframing Ambition as Alignment, Not Balance
You can apply the same principle without a formal program. If the thought of a 45-minute workout feels overwhelming, walking for 10 minutes may be more realistic. On another day, gentle stretching at home might feel manageable. That doesn’t mean forcing yourself through exhaustion or turning every difficult day into a self-improvement project. Motivation sometimes builds after you start moving.
“Every completed session creates another small win,” Wilson says. “Those wins build confidence, confidence builds consistency, and consistency gradually creates momentum.”
Persistent exhaustion or an inability to complete ordinary activities can also indicate a health concern that warrants professional attention. Movement can be helpful, but it shouldn’t become another expectation that leaves someone feeling inadequate when they’re struggling. For people who already exercise regularly, developing emotional fitness may have less to do with changing their routine and more to do with paying attention to what happens during it.
Most workouts have an obvious physical objective. You might be trying to improve your endurance or maintain strength as you age. Wilson’s framework asks you to notice your emotional state, too.
Before exercising, consider what’s occupying your attention. Perhaps you’re frustrated about something that happened earlier in the day or feeling anxious about a conversation you’ve been avoiding. You don’t necessarily need to resolve those feelings before moving. Instead, notice whether the activity changes your experience of them. If you’re walking, you might find that your thoughts become less repetitive after several minutes. During strength training, you may notice a tendency to become self-critical when an exercise feels difficult.
RELATED: You’re Exercising Regularly — So Why Can’t Your Body Keep Up?
If you finish a workout feeling just as frustrated as when you started, that doesn’t mean the activity was unsuccessful. Exercise doesn’t have to produce an immediate improvement in mood to be worthwhile. Wilson also encourages reflection afterward, particularly when something about the experience resembles a challenge outside the gym. Someone who notices that they become impatient with themselves during difficult exercises might consider whether that same pattern appears at work. Another person might recognize that slowing down during a workout feels uncomfortable because they’re accustomed to equating effort with productivity.
These observations won’t automatically change deeply ingrained behaviors, but they can provide useful information about how we respond to discomfort.
“One thing I’ve learned both personally and professionally is that healing rarely begins with feeling better,” Wilson says. “More often, it begins with taking one manageable step before you believe it’s going to make a difference.”

