Practising mindfulness, which includes paying close attention to what you eat, can help improve mental wellbeing. (Envato Elements pic)
PETALING JAYA: For many Malaysians, life is a constant balancing act. Between work deadlines, school runs, family commitments and endless notifications, taking time for yourself often feels like the first thing to fall off the to-do list.
According to clinical psychologist and lecturer Akif Farhan, that’s exactly why self-care deserves more attention, especially on International Self-Care Day.
“I think in this day and age, we prioritise a lot of things other than ourselves – our work, our children, our family,” he told FMT Lifestyle. “We tend to put ourselves last.”
The irony, he added, is that neglecting ourselves eventually makes it harder to fulfil those very responsibilities.
“For us to be able to maintain performing our responsibilities over a longer period of time, I think we need to prioritise self-care. And that doesn’t mean that we’re being selfish.”
One of the biggest barriers to self-care today isn’t necessarily a lack of time, but technology. Akif describes the phenomenon as “techno-stress”, where work and personal life increasingly blur because we’re always connected.
“The first thing we do is look at our screens, and the last thing we do before we go to sleep is also look at our screens,” he pointed out.
Research, he noted, shows that simply avoiding screens for 30 minutes before bedtime can improve sleep quality, which in turn contributes to better emotional wellbeing the next day.
Without clear boundaries, emails, WhatsApp messages and work notifications quietly creep into every corner of the day, leaving little room for genuine rest.
Akif Farhan says self-care should be a regular habit rather than something you turn to only when you feel overwhelmed. (Akif Farhan pic)
Rather than viewing self-care as an occasional indulgence, Akif likens it to maintaining a car.
“We use our car, and our car needs servicing. We don’t only send it for servicing every few months – we also take care of it regularly so it maintains its quality,” he said. “It’s the same with us.”
You may be able to keep pushing through deadlines and responsibilities without slowing down, but eventually the question becomes: “How long can we keep hustling before we start taking care of ourselves?”
The good news is that meaningful self-care doesn’t require expensive spa treatments or luxury holidays. Instead, Akif points to evidence-based habits that almost anyone can practise every day.
The first is getting enough sleep. “The better quality of our sleep actually predicts better mental health outcomes, physical outcomes and cognitive function outcomes,” he explained.
To improve sleep hygiene, he recommends keeping a regular sleep schedule, limiting caffeine in the late afternoon, and staying off screens for at least 30 minutes before bed.
Physical activity is another powerful tool. Akif said even simple movements count, such as taking the stairs, parking farther away from your destination, or going for a brisk walk.
“Those who are more physically active have better mental health and also better emotion regulation,” he said.
Equally important is setting digital boundaries. This could mean switching off work notifications during family time, keeping meals screen-free, or carving out even 15 to 30 minutes each day without technology.
Neglecting self-care over time can contribute to chronic stress, anxiety and depression. (Pixabay pic)
Finally, Akif recommends practising mindfulness. “Mindful eating is really paying attention to the food you eat: the taste, the flavour, instead of eating while looking at your phone.”
Even something as routine as taking a shower can become an opportunity to focus on the present instead of worrying about tomorrow or replaying yesterday’s mistakes.
While holidays, shopping or spa days can certainly help people recharge, Akif cautions against equating self-care with extravagant spending.
“If we were to base our self-care on things that require a lot of money, then how would people who don’t have enough resources practise self-care?”
Meanwhile, ignoring self-care altogether carries real consequences, including being in a state of constant, persistent stress.
“This leads to burnout, anxiety and depression; it perpetuates feelings of hopelessness and worthlessness,” he warned.
Ultimately, Akif’s message this International Self-Care Day is a simple one.
“Taking care of ourselves is not about waiting until we feel overwhelmed. It’s about what we do every day, building small, consistent habits that can strengthen our emotional resilience over time.”
