Do your mornings sometimes feel like a race against the clock?
Getting everyone dressed, fed, packed, and out the door can be stressful, especially when you’re repeating the same reminders every morning. But a hectic morning doesn’t have to be the daily norm.
A little structure can make a big difference. When children know what they need to do and have a routine they can follow, they can gradually become more independent and responsible for their own morning tasks.
A consistent routine also helps children understand expectations. Simple activities such as getting dressed, brushing their teeth, eating breakfast, packing their bags, and getting ready to leave can become familiar habits instead of tasks that require constant reminders.
The right routine will look different for every family. Younger children may need more guidance, while older kids can gradually take ownership of more responsibilities.
In this article, you’ll discover practical ways to create a morning routine for kids that adds structure to the start of the day while encouraging independence and responsibility. You’ll also learn how simple routine systems can make mornings easier for both parents and children.
And don’t forget to download the free Routine Cards for Kids at the end of the article. These visual cards can help children see what they need to do and work through their routine with less prompting.
Let’s make those busy mornings a little more organized and manageable.
Why is Morning Routine Important for Kids?
Establishing a morning routine for kids is the
perfect way to get kids to contribute. And there are benefits to it as well,
such as:
- Creating an increased sense of confidence and independence in your child: Your child will feel good about themselves knowing they can do some of the things you normally would do for them.
- Greater self-control: Your child will learn to appreciate the work/play balance, understanding certain things need to happen before they can have fun and relax
- Stress reduction: By knowing what is expected of them ahead of time, children will often feel less anxiety and worry.
- Teaching them healthy, lifelong habits: While it may seem silly to put items like “take a shower” or “wash your hands” or “make your bed” on a morning routine checklist… it actually works to instill good habits in your kids that they will hopefully carry with them later in life.
- Instills a sense of appreciation for what you do: By assigning your children certain responsibilities, you are guiding them towards a greater sense of appreciation for all that you do. Thus, they will be less likely to take you for granted later in life.
Establishing a morning routine sets a tone for the day.
Depending on the age and personality type of
your child, there are a variety of tactics you can choose from when creating a
morning routine that works for them specifically.
Keep in mind that every family’s situation is different.
Perhaps you have all toddlers? Tweens? Teens?
A mix?
Maybe your spouse travels a lot? Maybe you
both work? Maybe you stay at home?
Or, maybe you have a child on the spectrum? Or
one that suffers from ADHD, anxiety or OCD?
Regardless of your situation, an established
morning routine can make life a bit easier… and that is all any parent is
really hoping for.
In this article, I will provide a step by step process on how to create a morning routine for kids that works.
Before we proceed, if you prefer to watch instead of read, here’s the Youtube version of this article:
Step #1: Make a list of your daily responsibilities.
Starting with Monday, make a list of
everything you typically do on that day. Obviously, unplanned things will
sometimes occur; however, just keep this list to customary day-to-day
responsibilities.
Things like:
- Make breakfast
- Pack lunches
- Drive kids to school
- Make dinner
- Laundry
- Soccer practice
- Piano lessons
- Girl scout meeting
- Work report due
A good
rule of thumb is this: if it’s a typical daily chore
(aka, a mom/dad thing), or if it’s on your daily or weekly calendar, list it
here.
Do the same for the rest of the week.
Once you have the list in front of you, start
to check off the morning-relevant items you think your child could handle.
Note:
this step would also work for creating after school and weekend routine charts,
but we will save that for another article.
If you have more than one child, you may want to create separate columns and list age and behavior appropriate tasks in each. (Use behavior charts as visual reminders.)
Clearly, you wouldn’t include “load
dishwasher” on a toddler’s morning routine chart… but a child over the age of 9
could likely handle it (just watch for sharp knives).
You know your child best… so use your judgment when assigning tasks to him or her. This will help to ensure the chart is a positive experience for both of you.
Step #2: Know your audience.
Again, keeping your child’s age and abilities in mind is the key to success when creating a morning routine for kids that works.
The last thing you want is for your child to
feel as if a task is daunting… this will only foster resistance on their end, and
stress on yours.
For instance, do not ask a kindergarten-aged
child to pack their own lunch. Instead, give them the responsibility of packing
their snack from an approved snack drawer.
As a mother of four children, ages 4-9, I
elected to have two kid-friendly drawers in our house.
One is filled with parent-approved, simple
breakfast foods the kids can help themselves to in the morning (ie… granola
bars, dry cereal, rolls, raisins). The other contains “safe” school snacks they
can choose from.
You also need to keep a balance between the
amount of “life skill” items on the list, versus chore items.
Life skill items include things such as:
- Go to the bathroom before the bus comes
- Wash your hands
- Brush your teeth
- Comb your hair
- Put your shoes on
Chore items are those that will help you out,
such as:
- Make breakfast
- Get dressed
- Pack your backpack
- Make your bed
There are free printable charts online that
cater to different age groups. Some have
come up with “to do” items for you, others leave room for customization.
All of them suggest laminating the document after printing so that you can use dry-erase markers or easy-peel stickers. This allows the chart(s) to be reused, cutting down on waste of paper and printer ink.
For smaller children who can’t yet read,
charts with pictures seem to work well.
Here are some of the better ones I came
across:
Picture Centric Chore Chart: This one is meant to be circled… think routine chart meets an art project.
Source
Hybrid Chore Chart : Clip art pics and words make it easy for little tykes to follow.
Source
Juvenile Chore Chart: This one made the smaller children list for use of the word “potty”, but it could also probably work for kids under 6.
Source
Step #3: Give the routine purpose.
Categorizing the morning routine chart can
help children feel a bit more independent… especially those children between
the ages of 6 and 10-years-old (give or take a year on either end).
Categories will also create the illusion of
free thought by giving purpose to each task on the chart.
For instance, this free printable is semi-customizable and includes three main categories:
It allows you to place your own tasks in each
category, which can be a great point of discussion between you and your child.
You can ask them to come up with items (or
choose from a list you made) that they think should go into each section.
This method will give children the opportunity
to make a connection between their actions on various aspects of their
life.
This printable was probably my favorite for elementary school-aged children.
Honorable mentions include:
- Colorful and easy to follow:
Step #4: Don’t be too cutesy with older children.
Let’s be realistic if you’re the parent of a tween or teen… you are likely going to face some resistance when you spring a morning routine chart on them.
If not resistance, you’ll definitely witness
an eyeball roll or two. Guaranteed.
You see, most kids between the ages of eleven
and seventeen typically need to be told what to do.
Unlike younger children who yearn to feel grown-up, this age group actually thinks they are grown up. And that means they need a reality check.
They are living in your house and must do
their part. Nothing in life is free.
It’s as simple as that.
Your love, your time, your money… it is all
for them. So they need to be conditioned to respect that.
Straight forward, customizable charts
typically work best for older kids. They can even hang them in their rooms
should they choose.
You can find blank printables online, like this one. This is especially ideal if you have an older child that engages in after school activities.
Each night, you can have a discussion with
your child about the next day’s priorities… and assign tasks
accordingly. Items such as, “pack your
swim bag” or “prep an after school snack” would be a good fit for this type of
morning route chart.
As an added bonus, having discussions the night before allows your child to prep some things ahead of time… should they choose to cut down on what needs to be done in the morning?
It also helps eliminate any surprises, which
is great for kids who have a tendency to be anxious.
Planning ahead is one way to decrease the
stress associated with a fear
of being late in the morning.
Another decent chart that I came across was semi customizable, including a few “built-in” routines while leaving room for your own.
Step #5: Consider the “When Then” method to cut back on resistance.
A while back, I did a review on Positive Parenting Solutions… a world renowned
online program created to help parents end the power struggle with their
children. And there were some really
fantastic tips there.
The method that helped me the most was “When
Then”.
In a nutshell, “When Then” is simply phrasing
a demand you have of your child in a way that keeps it almost “closed ended”.
Consider the “When Then” method to cut back on resistance. You’d be surprised at how well this works, given you designate enough time toward the beginning of the day for your kid to complete all on the list done.
They may suspect they have a choice in the
matter, but they really don’t.
For example, instead of harping on them to
clean up their room, you would calmly say, “When you clean your room, then you
may watch television for 30 minutes”.
“When Then” is not you telling them to do
something now.
Or throwing out empty threats of punishment.
It is you merely stating a fact.
If they want something, then they need to do
something. There is no expiration on the conditions.
So how does this apply to a morning routine
for kids?
Well, you could think of it as a sort of
reward system.
On the top of the chart, write “When you do
these things each morning, then you get XX after school”.
XX could be technology time.
It could be a special snack… or their choice
for dinner.
Maybe they want to stay up 15 minutes past
their bedtime.
Whatever works.
And if they don’t finish all of their morning
duties, they simply don’t get the reward.
You’d be surprised at how well this works,
given you allot enough time in the morning for your child to get everything on
the list done.
In my house, we have an all-day list. Basically, there are things we expect them to do each day before they are allowed free technology time.
Some can be done in the morning, such as
making the beds and clearing the table… while others are to be done after
school, such as homework and putting laundry away.
My children race through the checklist and
haven’t given much resistance since we started it a few months ago.
Sure… that can change. I know this.
But part of being successful at establishing a
routine is knowing how to adapt.
This method may not work forever, especially
as my children grow and have more homework… activities… etc. For now, though, it’s effective.
[Are you separated from the other parent of your kid(s)? Find out some good ideas to help with your co-parenting trials.]
Step #6: Make it a team effort.
It is human nature to question authority at
times.
And when you’re a child, we as parents are the
“authority”.
We play a pivotal role in dictating what our
kids do, how they dress, what they eat, where they go, who they are friends
with.
The list goes on.
So, naturally, there will be times (likely
many of them) when our children demand reasons for our actions and our rules.
They will also call us “unfair” more times
than we can count.
That is why it is so important to make morning
routines appear to be somewhat of a team effort.
Make your morning routines a team effort and let your child know that you are not only directing or designating but instead requesting them to do their part in managing with the house.
Let your child know that you are not merely
dictating or delegating, but rather asking them to do their part in managing
the house.
And in doing their part, you will have more time to focus on quality time with them… whether that means watching a family movie together or cooking their favorite meal.
Think about it… if you didn’t have to spend an
hour each day folding laundry, you’d be able to spend some of that time
coaching their recreational basketball team.
You will also be less stressed, which will
result in less nagging and yelling.
Contemplate a chart similar to this one that incorporates routines you are each responsible for. This will ensure them you are working together to make mornings run as smoothly as possible.
You may also want to show them your original
to-do list (Step #1), so they see just how much you do for them on a regular
basis.
Free Download: Routine Cards for Kids
The Routine Cards for Kids provide simple visual reminders that help children follow their daily routines step by step. They’re a useful way to encourage independence, consistency, and responsibility at home.
Download your free routine cards and make it easier for your kids to stay on track each morning.
(The link opens up a Google Drive folder where you can get the PDF download for the Cards in a variety of sizes)
Final Thoughts on a Morning
Routine for Your Kids
Routines are a part of life.
School, activities/hobbies, work.
The minute you have a child, your routine
changes. It changes to center around them.
It is no longer just about making your day run smoothly… but about teaching them the values of contribution, responsibility, and punctuality. You can’t help but want to raise successful kids.
It is about making them better people and
equipping them for adulthood. For life.
Kids need to feel they are a part of something… and while they may not always like the tasks being asked of them, they will appreciate the discipline in the long run.
And if you’re looking for more resources to help parent your kids, be sure to check out these articles:
Finally, if you want to level up your parenting skills, then check out this resource that will show you how to get your kids to listen WITHOUT yelling, nagging, or losing control.
Nicole Krause has been writing both personally and professionally for over 20 years. She holds a dual B.A. in English and Film Studies. Her work has appeared in some of the country’s top publications, major news outlets, online publications, and blogs. As a happily married (and extremely busy) mother of four… her articles primarily focus on parenting, marriage, family, finance, organization, and product reviews.
