There are no shortcuts to any place worth going in life.
You have to do hard things to be happy in life. The things no one else is doing. The things that frighten you. The things others can’t do for you. The things that make you question how much longer you can hold on and push forward.
Why?
Because those are the things that define you. Those are the things that make the difference between existing and living — between knowing the path and walking the path — between a life of mediocrity and a life filled with progress and happiness.
Of course, the hard things are often the easiest things to avoid. To procrastinate. To make excuses. To pretend like they somehow don’t apply to you and your life situation.
But reality always rears its head in the end. And the truth about how ordinary people achieve immense happiness through incredible feats of progress is that they step out of their comfort zones and do the hard things that their more educated, affluent, and qualified counterparts don’t have the courage, drive or determination to do.
So for your own sake, start doing the hard things TODAY. I guarantee you will be blown away at just how remarkable you really are and just how amazing life can be. Here are some good ideas to get you started:
1. You have to take small chances every day.
It’s the best way to face any problem, crush fears, and overcome many of life’s greatest challenges. And you get just about as many chances in life as you’re willing to take. So never let your fear decide your future. Take small chances every day, one step at a time, and you will learn the way on the way. Some things will work out and some won’t. But good choices or bad, if you never take any chances, someone else will steer your decision-making and build your life for you. And you don’t want that.
2. You have to not worry so much about what others think.
A beautiful life is about spending your time passionately, being happy with who you are inside, and not worrying about everyone else’s petty judgments. If you want to achieve something unique and exciting in your life, stop looking for everyone’s approval. You don’t need constant approval to be happy or to follow your heart.
3. You have to stop comparing your journey to everyone else’s.
Your life is about breaking your own limits and outgrowing yourself to live YOUR best life. You are not in competition with anyone else. Plan to outdo your past self, not other people. Plan to grow stronger, not get even.
4. You have to invest in yourself daily.
Truth be told, there are only a few people in this world who will stay 100% true to you, and YOU should be one of them. Prioritize your own growth and needs into your daily to-do’s. Invest in your education, health, and happiness every single day. Create a life that feels good on the inside, not one that just looks good on the outside to everyone else. (Read “Choose Yourself!”)
5. You have to walk the talk.
Do not ask others or the universe to guide your footsteps if you’re not willing to move your feet. If you really want it, prove it! Happiness will come to you when it comes from you. Success will be yours when you take responsibility for making your goals a top priority.
6. You have to put your heart and soul into things.
Love is a verb. Act on it. Put your heart an soul into the goals and endeavors that move you. Work hard, track your progress, and learn to love the journey. In the end, it’s the love that makes you smile when you’re tired and still struggling.
7. You have to deliver results, even when excuses are easier.
NO shortcuts. NO quick fixes. NO blaming others. NO “I’ll do it tomorrows.” NO MORE EXCUSES! Just get started. Quit talking and begin doing! Laziness may appear attractive, but work leads to progress and happiness.
8. You have to be willing to fail forward.
The successful people who act the happiest are often the ones who have overcome the most. Sometimes you have to lose something precious in order to gain something priceless. Never regret your past mistakes and failures, because they have given you vital lessons and strength. The one who falls and gets up is much wiser and stronger than the one who never fell.
9. You have to let go of yesterday’s frustrations.
The story of your life has many chapters. One bad chapter doesn’t mean it’s the end. So stop re-reading the bad one already and turn the page. Accept what is, let go of what was and have faith in what can be. Remember, life does not have to be anywhere near perfect to be wonderful in the end.
10. You have to stop feeling sorry for yourself.
To those who are struggling, I understand how rough things are right now. I just want to let you know that things will get better, I promise. Keep pushing forward. I know you sometimes feel like nobody really cares, but you’re wrong. People care. I care, otherwise I wouldn’t be writing this. You’re not alone. We may be miles apart, but we’re all going through similar challenges. Realize that self-pity is not helpful. Life is not about feeling sorry for yourself. It’s about forgiveness, acceptance, and looking forward to what makes you stronger and better off in the long run.
11. You have to toughen up.
The strongest, happiest, most successful people are NOT those who always win, but those who don’t give up when they lose. Again, they fail forward. So keep calm when everything seems to be going wrong. You may feel weak but your spirit is strong. When things are tough, you must be tougher. Don’t pray for an easy life, pray for the strength to endure a hard and long one filled with gradual progress and happiness.
12. You have to fight hard for what you believe in.
Great strength comes from overcoming what others believe is impossible… and sometimes you have to lose the battle to win the war. So if you believe strongly in something, fight for it. In time things will fall into place, maybe not today, but eventually — maybe not exactly how you planned, just how it’s meant to be. (Note: Angel and I discuss this in more detail in the Adversity chapter of “1,000 Little Things Happy, Successful People Do Differently”.)
13. You have to practice patience.
Don’t rush it. Be patient. Keep a good attitude while working hard for what you believe in. When the time is right, it’ll happen.
14. You have to take control of your thoughts.
It’s often our own thinking that hurts us. Realize this. You can’t solve your problems with the same thinking you used to create them. There’s no reason to imprison yourself. Don’t think outside the box. Think like there is no box.
15. You have to smile more often.
Happiness is in the heart and mind, not in random circumstances. Beautiful things happen when you distance yourself from negative thinking. Try to be positive and smile right now, not because everything is good, but because you can see the good side of some things in front of you. Smiling doesn’t always mean you’re happy either, sometimes it simply means you’re strong. And smiling is a physical action that can actually help you feel better from the outside in.
16. You have to spend more time with the right people.
And if you know the people around you aren’t the right people, you need to change the people around you. It’s not easy but it’s worth it. Don’t expect to see positive changes in your life if you surround yourself with negative people. Don’t give part-time people a full-time position in your life. Know your value and what you have to offer, and never settle for relationships that keep holding you back in life.
17. You have to stand up for yourself.
Some people will do anything for their own personal gain at the expense of others — cut in line, take money and property, bully and belittle, pass guilt, etc. Do not accept this behavior. Do not let people walk all over you. Most of these people know they’re doing the wrong thing and will back down and apologize surprisingly quickly when confronted. In most social settings people tend to keep quiet until one person speaks up, so SPEAK UP when you must.
18. You have to practice forgiveness.
Kindness is not to be mistaken for weakness, nor forgiveness for acceptance. It’s about knowing that resentment is not on the path to happiness. Remember, you don’t forgive people because you’re weak, you forgive them because you’re strong enough to know that people make mistakes. And you forgive them to free yourself and detach from their actions. (Read “Loving What Is”.)
19. You have to reach out and help people.
The closest thing to being cared for is to care for others. We are all in this together and we should treat each other as such. Your beliefs alone don’t make you a better person, your behavior does. Use your voice for kindness, your ears for compassion, and your hands for charity, as often as you can. And you don’t always need a reason to help someone else. Just do it when the opportunity arises.
20. You need to be present for it all.
Find your balance between planning and presence. When life is good, enjoy it. Don’t go looking for something better every second. Happiness never comes to those who don’t appreciate what they have. You must be willing to loosen your grip on the life you have planned so you can enjoy the life that is waiting for you in this moment. It may not be everything you want for your future, but it’s everything you need right now.
Now it’s your turn…
The next step forward is yours for the taking. Just pick one of the aforementioned points and start focusing on it a little bit every day. Practice. The key is making sustainable shifts in your beliefs and behavior. That means practicing each point gradually — one at a time, one day at a time, and then letting them build on one another. Go from zero to 20 over the course of 6-12 months, not all at once.
But before you go, please leave Angel and me a comment below and let us know what you think of this list. Your feedback is important to us. 🙂
Which one of the points above resonated the most today? What’s one hard thing you do that makes you happier?
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Photo by: Dimitris Papazimouris
